FYI: If I was My Mom, I wouldn't Read this

I found a scorpion in my boot.  Id love to be dramatic and tell you it was huge, but it was just a little scorpion, chilling in my boot.  I made my 2 year old host brother step on it.  Ive also started my 6 year old host brother on organ lessons, and I got to meet my 19 year old host brothers secret girlfriend from the neighboring town of Chacrasana.  More on this stuff later?  Yesterday, my family and I made spicy sauce, called Ahi, which goes on everything.  I was cutting up the peppers, and I didn't wash my hands well enough.  I touched my eyes, bad Idea, I spent the next 35 minutes looking for contact solution in my first aid kit.  There was no relief.  It was, awful.  Hot peppers in the eyes just dont go away quickly.  My training yesterday was fantastic.  4 hours of Spanish.  4 Hours of responsible sex practices in rural Peru.  They don't tell you not to do it.  They just warn against it.  I suppose as a government program, this should be expected.  We watched a video, 5 people told us all about how horrible their lives were since contracting HIV in peace corps.  The HIV rate is .5% of the peruvian population.  Now you know, I hope you feel deterred.  More importantly however, beware the green card chasers.  Almost all volunteers, we were warned, get attacked by hoards of women wanting to improve their lives.  We instantly outclass all native born peruvian men, and plus, we don't beat our wives and possess higher rates of fidelity.  Henceforth from meeting you, they set about the task of  impregnate themselves, lavish you with attention, and demanding marriage.  I cant blame them exactly, If roles were reversed Id totally be hitting up american peace corps women, whom country director Michael Hirsch described as the "ultimate conquest".  Men, were not so much the ultimate conquest, as a lifelong meal ticket.  In addition we were warned that there have been 2 rapes of PCV in peru since the program was reinstated in 2001, now those two men now rot in jail.  Mostly however, the session was on different cultural expectations.  You kiss a girl, she's your girlfriend, so don't kiss two.  Hell, don't even dance with two.  And Latin Ladies are a little crazy apparently, jealous and uneducated about safe sex.  Putting a condom on is to peruvian women an insult.  Age isn't such an issue here, but beware, The Protect Act, applies to peace corps volunteers too.  For those of you who don't know, the Protect Act allows American citizens to be prosecuted in America for sex with a minor abroad.  I think im safe.  Celibacy is totally my style.  One volunteer on the panel commenced relations with his host sister and subsequently had to change his site.  He recommended strongly not to engage in any relationships within your host community if its smaller than 2000 people, as it will, without exception, distract you from your work.  Chisme, spanish for Gossip, is a big deal.  If you invite a girl into your home, you better have an exit strategy.  No girl, no matter from where, is going to spend the night under your host families roof.  American girls that come to visit, will be put up in neighbors houses, and if you must, commence your sexual activities at a local hostel.  Hostels...  Hostels arent for dirty German hippies roaming south america on adventures.  The whole industry exists because you gotta someplace, and its not gonna be under your parents roof.  We were warned that pretty much, if your friends with a girl, you might as well be "doing" her because the communities gonna accuse you of it anyway.  On a side note, a little peace corps chisme, not one volunteer has gotten any that I know of, from another volunteer or from any peruvians, period.  Apparently the celibacy rate among sworn in volunteers is much lower, and the Youth Development tech trainer, Bianca, is actually married to a peruvian that she met during service.  Im pretty sure there's not gonna be any intergroup couples here, no one seems to hit it off like that so far; excluding the 2 married couples here.  If it seems like I'm being over the top in my description of this sex talk and the impressions that I came away with, its because it was a wholly negative talk.  They made peruvian women out to be prostitutes, which by the way is a semi-legalized industry, and Peruvian men out to be dogs intent on owning an American woman.  I took mild offense at the broad generalizations, and I hope that my experiences, which have so far been entirely positive, don't sway me toward this negativity.   I feel like Peace Corps had to warn us, and now they have.  Their hands now clean of responsibility, were off on our own.  I wasn't born yesterday; I'm a naturally distrusting New York/New Jerseyanite... bring it on.  This morning was more spanish lessons.  There's gonna be a huge party in Yanacoto on friday, Im already pumped, however, my second spanish test is on Saturday, and Id really love to break the intermediate level, so Ill probably go home early.